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What is GOATA?
This past week I’ve listened to a podcast interviewing the guys from the GOATA Movement. It intrigued me enough to watch some of the YouTube videos. The first question I inevitably asked was, “what the hell is GOATA?” GOATA stands for either Greatest of All Time Action or Greatest of All Time Athlete. These guys are concerned with right movement and they make some pretty controversial claims. If you listen to them, you get very much the same vibes you got from early CrossFit videos. Now this is not attack, I think old CrossFit overall was a net good, but like all things in the modern world, it gets corrupted by leftists.
Now if you’re young, you might not remember old CrossFit. It used to be this underground hardcore training movement. Sometime back around 2007, fren showed me video of a guy doing a heavy Fran workout and I was motivated to train(haven’t stopped since). Many of the old CrossFit types were explicitly pro-law enforcement, pro-military, which back in those days was basically right wing. CrossFit’s crazy founder, Greg Glassman found interesting way to motivate men to train. He said, “men will die for points.”
What he brought to the table is intensity in training. Actually pushing yourself in your workouts. Now the kipping shit isn’t necessary, but there’s a lot to learn from this mentality. I say all this at the beginning so when I say GOATA reminds me of CrossFit, I want you to understand what I mean. Make no mistake, these GOATA guys will be controversial, perhaps even to RWBBs. GOATA doesn’t like CrossFit, it doesn’t even like squats and deadlifts. They believe those exercises breakdown the body and lead to injury.
These GOATA guys believe they’ve discovered the ancient movement geometry of the universe. They speak on how we should move according to nature and how our modern lifestyle is crushing your body’s health. They’ve put together their movement philosophy by studying the greatest of all time athletes like Michael Jordan or Ed Reed, to the primitive tribes of the world, to how babies move as well as 100 year olds who are still running. They’ve found similarities in how they move and have dubbed this the sacred geometry.
This geometry they’ve not only found in those groups of people, but they see the same geometry in hurricanes, to the DNA double helix, all the way to the movement of our solar system. There talk that there are many different running patterns and gaits, but according to GOATA there is only one and when you follow it, you avoid many of the ailments and injuries of the modern age. Much of what they’re saying is targeted toward sportsball players, but their message is for everyone. They make the claim that you as a normie need to hear what they have to say more than the sportsball player.
What does their philosophy boil down to? The way we’re supposed to walk and run is burned into our DNA. Do it the right way and you don’t have blown knees and hurt backs. An easy way to visualize what they want you to do(I am not expert in this, watch their YouTubes) is to see your body as a chain of working parts. Two columns specifically move your body. Ankles, knees, hips, and shoulders must be aligned as columns for proper movement.
When an athlete blows out a knee or calf, it’s because their body didn’t do what it’s designed to do. It’s been corrupted by modern systems like weightlifting. The foot is designed to land on the balls of your feet, specifically on the blade, where your small toes are. This creates a bow in the leg and propels you forward. You’ve heard of blade runner, right? Think about blade walking first.
Much of their training is designed with this in mind. They use heel raises the wrong way to emphasize the bow in the leg, for example. Do squats on the balls of their feet because when you do squats the right way, it encourages bad positions for movement. They are trying to become what they call “back chain dominate” while squats and deadlifts make you front chain dominate.
Their philosophy goes beyond movement. They care about how you rest too. Primitive don’t have chairs and couches. They rest on the ground and you should too. If you do this, it will unload your back and ease back pain. Ever hear of the Grok squat? It’s basically a squat position that mimics how primitive tribes sit and wait for prey.
What’s the Barbaric verdict on this?
When you listen to these guys talk, a lot of what they say make sense, but you get old CrossFit vibes. CrossFitters were cocky as fuck, especially when they started taking about other methodologies. These guys are the same way. I’ve been training for over twelve years now and been hit with many ailments that are catching up with me today.
I have lingering back soreness/pain, though it goes away when deadlifting or doing RDLs, hanging from a pull up bar. Spending time on the ground instead of on chairs does seem to make pain go away. The way they show you how to walk and run feels right. There’s more spring in the step. It’s worth listening to what they have to say and trying some of it out.
Try to do some of what they ask. Can you squat all the way down, with feet straight, and rest in this position(kind of like how a cat rests)? When you walk, is it with the blade or heel first? Try with the blade and see how it feels.
I don’t know about abandoning squats and deadlifts, but maybe I’ll try out a GOATA inspired leg day.